Bored.

I'm at work. Bored. I think I will talk about Madison...



She is 7 months old today! She is growing soooo fast! I can't believe how fast the time is passing. She is chewing on everything (has two teeth so far). She is starting to not sleep so well because of her teething ---it doesn't stop at night, ya know. So, its kinda like we are starting over...waking up at three am sometimes and its pretty frustrating because she has slept through the night since she was 2 months old. But, I wouldn't take anything in the world for her because she brings me such joy =) I can't explain it.



I was FREAKED out when I found out I was pregnant. I didn't want it to be true...I was so scared because I thought she would be coming at the most inopportune time, me starting nursing school the next semester and all. To think I didn't want to be a mom! Man! I wouldn't have it any other way! She is my reason for living. My everything. I just love her so much and I know she loves me because, although she can't talk yet, when I walk into the room, she lights up! Just smiles so big and her eyes follow my every move. She does that with her dad, too. Chris never wanted kids. Not having a stable father figure in his life until he was 21, he told me that he wasn't sure that he would make a good enough dad because he never had an example. Now? Geez, he is so great with Madison. Even he says, "I can't believe I didn't want to be a dad." We love parenthood! And I absolutely do not think that I started too young. I am 21 now and I feel that I had Madison at the perfect time. Of course, I know that God is watching out for our family always and that His timing is always perfect. She has completed a once broken family and now we are stronger than ever! So, little did I know at the time I got pregnant, she is a blessing for so many reasons.



Sometimes I wonder what kind of person she will be when she's older. What will she look like? What will her interests be? What will she want to be when she grows up? Stuff like that. I want to talk to her and have her respond back to me with words. I want to know everything about her and what makes her tick...And I want to know it all now...Then again, I don't. I don't want her to grow up. I want to be able to hold her forever and see the love in her eyes that she has for me now. I don't ever want that to waiver. I dread the teen years because I know teens rebel. I DID! I don't want her to be mad at me ever but I know its gonna happen. I wish I could freeze time. She is the perfect child. Always happy, doesn't fuss about much of anything, just wonderful!



Do I sound like a neurotic momma??? Hope not. I could go on and on forever about my angel. And she is an angel! AND SHE SAVED ME.